myfriz.com

So it's been a little over 48 hrs since Keoni came into my life...  It's been a journey already.  One of learning and adapting to my new life.  ..  I have hardly slept since I came to the hospital Wednesday morning, but I've been okay.  I don't know if it's due to years of insomnia, but taking 1-2 hr naps here and there have been enough to keep me going.  Both Freddie and I have spent the last two days bonding with Keoni and trying to figure out the little guy.  For me, I'm trying to get the breastfeeding down.  We're both learning and I'm hoping both Keoni and I get the process down pat sooner than later.  I know it's a learning process that requires patience and persistence and I am committed to going as far as I can to be successful with it.

So on Thursday Freddie went home for a few hours to take a shower and rest up a bit...  When he came back, he told me he got all choked up driving home and almost cried.  Actually I think he did tear up though...   I guess the reality began to sink in.  He is now a father and has a family of his own.  I can already feel the love he has for Keoni by watching him interact with him.  I know it's going to be a long and challenging time for a bit while we all adjust to each other and become a family, but I think Fred and I established our relationship well enough prior to bringing Keoni into it that we'll be just fine. 

Keoni himself has been doing well.  He cries here and there, but it hasn't been to the point where it's been overwhelming.  We bring him to the nursery if we need to rest and the nurses take good care of him.  I can feel myself bonding with him with every feeding and with every interaction I have with him.  I am still trying to absorb the reality as well.  Today we met with the pediatrician here at the hospital and he told us that Keoni's bilirubin level were a bit above average causing jaundice.  I know that this is a common occurrence with newborns so I was not alarmed or worried when he told me this.  He's now in the incubator under a bili light getting exposed to phototherapy.  He was put in there around 8pm Friday evening and will be in there through the night and into Saturday.  Hopefully he has many bowel movements and urinates so his bilirubin count decreases.  We'll see where he stands later on in the day today. 

Freddie went home to sleep today.  He looked so exhausted by the time he left the hospital...  My insomnia has sort of prepared me for lack of sleep, but I know it's going to be a major adjustment for him.  Hopefully he'll get a good night's sleep tonight to prepare for the many sleepless nights ahead...  We'll need to establish a routine so we both don't get burned out...